Garden of Eden

0 reviews for “Garden of Eden”

1. The DJ said someone in the front row smelt like refried beanshahaI can’t with this ratchet place.

2. There’s a reason they have few stars. THIS IS NOT A NIGHTCLUB or a BAR. This place is a creepy little tiny hole in the wall. They have a bunch of chubby “ladies” wearing clothes that are 5 sizes too small, standing out in front heckling passersby in order to distract you from the little tiny sign that says NO ALCOHOL and NO REFUNDS. We literally walked in and walked right back out in less than one second. They refused to refund our money. Refused to proved their name or address. Ridiculous. Will never be back and won’t recommend to anyone. Why not try to be decent with people and remind them when they pay that no alcohol is served? How many groups of people hit the clubs, pay a large cover to have a glass of water? However, after I threw a fit, a different big security dude calmed me down and took us across the street for free entry to another club where we ended up having the best time ever! Thank you to the 2nd big security dude for showing some class.

3. I’m not going into details as to how our double date night ended up at this place after dinner. But all I can say is you live once and it’s the spontaneous times that make life fun and interesting!With that said, it was an interesting experience indeed. They gave us a special: 30 per couple so essentially 15 per person, which wasn’t bad. I think my friend and I enjoyed ourselves more than the guys. We got a kick out of the other men putting the tips in front of us so they can see us get a show. I wasn’t too impressed with the ladies though. Cellulite and tats depreciated the beauty in my opinion.The guys happened to sit close to the stage when the prettiest girl went up to dance. Those lucky bastards! But she ended up being a real tease – only stripping until the very end. I was that close to yelling, “TAKE IT OFF ALREADY” when she finally slipped her bra straps down.

4. Very hot!!!

5. very, very pushy girls at this club. they want your money, they want all of it, and they want it NOW. no sense in trying to talk to any of them. anything short of you giving them your entire billfold by just them sitting down is going to result in an earfold about you being a cheap bastard. check out IRIS, who’s an amazing brunette with an all-natural body. then leave. quickly.

7. The club is ok and some of the dancer were nice. But there are others who are pretty rude and ignore customers. One dancer looked like a transvestite. But Vega…Damn she was hot!

8. What a rip off. Got a VIP dance over the weekend and they double charged me on two of my cards when they were only supposed to charge one of them. I will be contacting my bank and filing an official grievance against them. Whats worse is they didn’t even give me the full time on my dance. The girls are hot, but being overcharged by $300 does not make it worth it. Save your money and move to a different club down the street.

10. Go check out Veronica and Vega they are hot as hell! with real bodies.

11. This was my first time. Surprisingly, it was different than I expected. My idea of strip clubs comes directly from movies and TV shows. I expected a big room with multiple catwalks, poles, and ladies walking around everywhere serving drinks are other services. This is not what happened at Garden of Eden.This is a small joint that charges you and your group a cover. If you can talk slick and have group that looks like they will spend money or something, you might be able to cut a deal with the bouncer. For instance, we had a couple of military guys and some girls with us, so our group of about 8 got in for $30 total. I think they charge $20 each usually. Inside there’s a small stage with one pole and girls take turns dancing on the pole. Usually it’s a solo girl, but sometimes groups of 2 or 3 will dance together as a team. The lights were dim and the place was kinda crowded, but not too crowded. I found a seat around the small stage easily. It didn’t seem like it was that dirty inside, but it’s hard to tell with the dark lighting. There were some creepy looking dudes, but since I was in a big group, it didn’t feel to dodgy. I never imagined myself sitting in a chair waving folded dollar bills. I guess most importantly, the girls were a little less than decent looking, but nonetheless decent, so it was not bad.Overall, it was an interesting experience for my first time and I spent $20 total–can’t beat that. I’d recommend going with a big group (8-10 people).

12. So very ratchet lol. I went to see some simple dancing…..I ended up with a near reenactment of the ending of “Requiem for a Dream.”AASSSSHH to AASSSHHH….

13. This club is very small and has limited seatings so the choices of seating are the back row (which fill up quickly) and the front row. The atmosphere is nice, has a garden theme and the lights is easy on the eyes. Seating is comfortable and i think drinks are free, maybe because i tiped well i dont know. The ladies that i veiwed were not great the first time i went. They were older and not very pleasent to look at. They had one or more of: harry, loose skin down there, saggy stomachs (like they just had a baby, and/or breasts so large and deformed she should have sued for a bad breast job. But besides that they were very eager to please. They were not afraid to rub you touch you and give you special attention while on stage. The second time i went in (1.5 hours later) there were younger ladies up on stage. They were not as eager to please as the older ladies but they had moves and bods to make you want more. Most ladies were nice and did not hassel you for too long, and the dj has good sounds and only asks for tips when no one tips (which is most of the time (cheap skates)). Really good expericnce plus, pay an extra 20 bucks for the red arm band at the door, this will grant you in an out privilages for that same club that day plus Hungry I, Little Darlings, Roaring 20’s, and the Condor club with no extra charges. Great time.

14. Definately not one of the classiest places i’ve been! The bathroom is gross!! There is only one SEXY lady there and that is Malibu!!! I would not recommend this club to anyone….but Malibu is hot so maybe you wanna go check her out.

15. First I would like to say this place was a fun first time experience for me. The girls were honestly super fun and nice. However the DJ sucked. There were awkward pauses.. Shouldn’t you keep the music going ? The space was smaller than I expected. The entrance fee was $15 for each person. You are required to be 18. Over all this was a decent experience. They do care about their customer. If there is an issue that comes up they will help you settle it. Someone pulled my friend out of the chair with a really bad attitude, however they apologized and took care of it in a nice way. Enjoy yourself, it’s a really happy environment. People are just there to have fun !

16. good club, very nice dancers,

17. Hello this broke cheap place scammed me with there security guards and there stamps watch out they work together never take a date there in there birthday they will double than over charge

18. the last time i was out here was in 2006, we did a party on broadway and it was dead…. stop by garden, found out it was my friend working there… got hook up no problem… didn’t really blew me away but its something to do… haha…

19. Wandering away from happy hour, a lapse in good judgement drew us into this place…way too early. So early, it was like a private club for us that looked like a dumpy leftover from the ’80s on the inside. We were like raw meat in a tiger’s cage.Stepping out for drinks and returning three hours later, it finally got crowded and interesting. I thought most of the girls were decent, a few a bit aggressive about selling a lapdance. Sometimes for a free DVD or t-shirt. Like I want that stuff.It was a bit amusing to see every dancer windex down the pole before their turn (something I realize makes complete sense and had not seen in clubs outside of SF). And I thought the female audience participation was…uh, an interesting surprise…

20. I walked in to see that this club is extremely small. The girls were quick to welcome me in. Only one stage and all the chairs and seats had holes torn in them. Private dance was not worth it and was not $20. Girl was drunk and sloppy. She broght in some more alcohol to the booth and was buggin the other guys when they tried to leave, while atempting to give me my lap dance. She left the booth wide open as well. I dont think I will go there again.

21. ljbznt

22. I was in the front row putting some ones up on stage when this girl reaches down into my lap and trys to take my money!!!!!!

23. If you’re a top-notch hoe, do not come here. I came here this time last year and the memory still scars my soul. First off, the bouncers had the AUDACITY to want to charge me to get in?! I’m the finest bitch in here, don’t ever make me pay to look at a cold stripper with braces! I came with 4 of my guy friends after work…like a random ass Tuesday. Pretty empty, it’s my first time at a strip club so I’m hyped (minus the cover charge ordeal). We all sit front row and here comes this pathetic bitch…I was literally laughing out loud when I saw her. Mediocre Asian woman…with braces — I CAN’T!!!!!!! She had like a solid 5-minute set and only $2 were thrown at her…then I felt bad. She had her pussy out and everything…only $2! WOW. A couple other girls come on stage and it was just whatever. THEN…it happens….I’m suddenly mesmerized with this woman on stage…we lock eyes…she takes off her clothes…and spreads her legs in front of my face. O_O I keep smiling and then…I GET PULLED ON STAGE! AHHHHHH!! I’m a fetus on stage WTF?? I am so embarrassed! LMAO LMAO LMAOI was feeling myself so I got over it quick and just rolled with the punches. I was motor boating this broad…my homies were too juiced btw, acting like straight boofs. Anyway, she starts taking my top off…then my bra…….lifts my skirt!!! I’m getting a little wet thinking about this..So the guy on the mic is going wild!!!!!!!! He offered me a job before I got off stage -_- Once the blood returned to my brain, I realized that it was time to go. As we left, it dawned on me that I did not have my panties…did she keep them? I apparently left my soul, dignity and self-respect behind too. Eh, fuck it. YOLO! +1 for losing my strip club virginity+1 for getting freaky on stage

24. Terrible. Plenty of other places to go to on the same street. Jerkoff bouncers and below average dancers.

25. Ewwwwwwwwww!!!! NAH!!!

26. The one word to sum up this place is SHITHOLE! The flashy green sign entice me to go in and I pay the five dollar cover charge at the door. The inside smells dirty and the it looks gross and unkept. There is one stage in the middle and the girls are called up to dance one at a time. The women are trashy and unattractive. A flat chested white girl enters the stage and circled around the pole. She made little eye contact with the few people in the audience and mainly looks at herself in the mirror. All of the sudden a dark skinned stripper grabs my hand and attempts to drag me to the back room for a lap dance. I’m soo turned off and frightened that I run out of the place. I haven’t been to a strip club since.

27. the dj plays great music and the staff as well as girls are ell very pleasing

28. Came here on a Friday night. Small place, arrived early and was slow of course. Cute girl on stage tho, who did her thang! Many of these girls here are starting in the industry and are working their way up, so dont expect bombshells! They were all super nice and super sweet for the most part. What they charge you is all dependent on your approach and if they feel you or not. Take notes.

29. Got dragged into this place by my dumbass friend on another friends birthday night. Paid a $15 cover and sat down. This place is ghetto as hell, and at least 50% of the girls have teeth missing. I decided to just chalk up the $15 as a donation and just get the hell out of there. I ended up going to the pizza place right across the street from sams burgers, which was a much better time than garden of eden anyday.

30. Ok, this place is one of the trashiest strip clubs I’ve been to. They are a full nude strip club so there is no alcohol provided. The strip club is very small and there is only one small stage that all the guys hover around. The place gets super packed on Friday and Saturday nights. Right when you walk in, you see the lap dance booths to the left and in the room there is one stage where all the seats are faced. The wall is completely mirrored off. They have recently completed a restoration which improved the look . . . a little. Let’s talk about the girls. The girls are not pretty by any means. They are the nastiest girls, but there are one or two out of 20 that are decent. I have to admit, the girls may not be the best looking, but you know they are the funnest to watch. They bring people on stage and humiliate the crap out of them. This is why I gave the Garden a 3 star rating, because the girls are very entertaining and fun. I mean, who goes to strip clubs for the sexual aspect? We all go for the entertainment and laugh at the patrons who are humiliated (like the guys who get spanked on stage). One warning I’d like to offer you is that I was given a full menu of how much an “extra” would cost. First of all, you’re stupid if you take them up on the offer . . .second of all, the girls are nasty and you are probably the 30th guy they serviced. Just be careful and don’t do anything stupid. Otherwise, have your fun and get ready to laugh at the guy who had his baseball cap rubbed on some stinky butt crack.

31. My buddy and I just stayed in the area for 8 nights… We were continually harassed by these “ladies” and several other places we passed by nightly trying to enjoy our vacation… One night two “girls” grabbed us by the arm and drug us back to this place… They only managed to steal 40 dolllars from us but they wanted credit cards right away with the promise of unwanted sexual acts… It was clear it was scam right away… I wish there was a way to report this to SF folks and unknowing tourists… What a scam ! Run… Do not enter this place !

32. Man this place is a doozy. I went there the other night and got the best show EVER from Vegas and Amira. They rocked my world: hot bodies, beautiful faces, all the curves…ahh. Definitely get a dance from these girls cuz they make it worth the extra.

33. This place doesn’t seem as gnarly as people say it is. Maybe that’s just a result of my Market Street Cinema visit desensitizing me from everything sketchy and skeezy in the world, as well as the fact that we didn’t go into the back room this time. Overall, it did seem cleaner than I thought it would be, after reading some other people’s reviews. If you’re a girl, chances are you can get in for free, or at least cheap. I think it’s free if you bring guys with you. I think the non – discounted cover is $20, which is pretty standard for SF clubs.The club itself is tiny. I thought Little Darlings was tiny, but this place is even smaller. It”s basically two or three rows of chairs and a couple small tables in the back, so a lot of people stand. If you sit in the front and tip, the girls will, of course, come up to you and give you special attention, motorboating and what have you.The girls are decent- looking; no super – knockouts, but no one scarred me for life. Girls are always going to be of mixed hotness levels at any club, but they’re pretty good here. Some of them could work the pole pretty well, too. So, I’d say it was a fun time for all. Not too shady, but still delightfully tacky.

34. What you smell as you enter this place is disappointment and here are some of the contributing factors:1. The obese guy in the cheap suit who calls himself the manager is a complete dbag. The stage sat empty for 30+ mins and when we said something he replied with some smug comment. He seemed better suited to be selling used cars in the east bay.( I’m sure he doesn’t have the balls to reply to this)2. The chunky monkeys on stage tell you anything to get your money and then disappear.3. They only have 1 small stage. I would recommend trying out any of the other clubs in SF.

35. I’ve never been here, but my friend told me all about it. From what he said, it sounds awesome. The dancers are pretty aggressive so you have to be careful not to get swindled. If you go on an off-day, like a Tuesday or something (which I’ve never done), it’ll be empty and the ladies will be all over you.My friend likes to creep them out by asking them what blood type they are. They’ll most likely leave you alone after that.I’d like to go here, but I’m too busy reading the Book of Job in the Old Testament and denouncing evolution to go out. Someday…

36. What? You can’t give out more than 5 stars? Whaat?$20 for a bracelet that gets you in/outs at 4 diff clubs. Sweet! I like how the show girls will get the attractive, but “innocent” looking females in the audience to dance up on stage w/them. Once, you flash em boobies tho– you’re no longer “innocent”. Trust me- I know.. haha Joking! Sorta…[coked-out stripper pulled me up on stage. I’s very hesitant. I didn’t want my guy friends (who are like bro’s to me] to see my teets! And, they didn’t wanna see them either). I gave in & got up there. Seductively danced with the broad for a hot sec. The room went wild. Then as she tried lifting up my shirt– I pulled it right back down, smacked her ass, and got off the stage before anyone could see my stuff. Hey, I didn’t wanna leave lookin like a fool.but, I’m very self-conscious about my bod. I couldn’t be a stripper worth shit.Ahh, nudie bars– Good ol’ fashion, recession-proof entertainment!

37. Terrible, girls are so greedy you cannot possibly enjoy yourself, the bouncers are weak punks too. Everyone in there tries to rob you of your credit card, I kid you not they will ask to have your credit card AND your pin. Obviously the SFPD has their pockets lined pretty well for this shithole to be in business. You are better off not going to a strip club in SF, just go get a massage in chinatown.

38. it is the best club ive ever been to. even the door girls are hot!!

39. I just want to say I had the most fun ever with this dancer named peaches,

    she’s a beautiful white girl. Peaches has a great stage show, but the real fun

    goes down with one on one time….shes a great lap dancer will have you at

    the edge of your seat! I will always go back to her …….Go check the club out,

    I also had some amazing one on one with malibu, zoe, & alize…all four of

    them were friends so they hooked me up with eachother! I had the most fun I

    have ever had at a strip club, and I have been to them all in S.F. So for real go

    check this one out!

40. I had a great time a Saturday night by the way i got a dance from a latin gal Veronica it was amazing.

41. The only reason that I’m giving this place more than one star is because the girls were so down. If you have serious to money to blow then I’m sure it is great. They basically robbed me, and screwed up my bank account. They charged me over double of what I had agreed

42. Hey it was sleazy, it was cheap. I spent twenty bucks for me and my girl to get in. There was some hot looking girls, there was some drugged up looking girls and there were ugly girls. We got to sit close and see some titty and booty and my girlfriend loved every minute of it. I’m ain’t got no complaints. I forgot to mention the twenty bucks got us into a sister club with a hand stamp.

43. I was enjoying myself until one of the girls talked me into a lap dance with her. Once we did she kept trying to get me to give her $200 more to do whatever I want to her. When I said no she got pissed and only gave me 1/2 a lap dance to one song…. I will not go to the back anymore with girls at this club.

44. This club is very small and has limited seatings so the choices of seating are the back row (which fill up quickly) and the front row. The atmosphere is nice, has a garden theme and the lights is easy on the eyes. Seating is comfortable and i think drinks are free, maybe because i tiped well i dont know. The ladies that i veiwed were not great the first time i went. They were older and not very pleasent to look at. They had one or more of: harry, loose skin down there, saggy stomachs (like they just had a baby, and/or breasts so large and deformed she should have sued for a bad breast job. But besides that they were very eager to please. They were not afraid to rub you touch you and give you special attention while on stage. The second time i went in (1.5 hours later) there were younger ladies up on stage. They were not as eager to please as the older ladies but they had moves and bods to make you want more. Most ladies were nice and did not hassel you for too long, and the dj has good sounds and only asks for tips when no one tips (which is most of the time (cheap skates)). Really good expericnce plus, pay an extra 20 bucks for the red arm band at the door, this will grant you in an out privilages for that same club that day plus Hungry I, Little Darlings, Roaring 20’s, and the Condor club with no extra charges. Great time.

45. I haven’t been here in ages but this was my first strip club, so of course I’ve got great memories of this place. I got in without a cover charge that night and saw that they had free soda!!! I don’t remember how many girls we saw that night but they were stripping. I’m sure they couldn’t have been that bad, but then I was just barely 18 when I went. I have always wanted to go back and see what I think now that I’ve been to a couple other clubs.

46. Had a bachelor party here last night club was cool beautiful women everywhere. The mngr Jason was awesome he gave us a VIP booth and got my brother on stage with all the girls. I will define toy be back!!

47. This club is waaaaay too raunchy for my taste!!! There’s no attempt at ambience, romance, or even artful lust…it’s straight up lechery without a towel or phone call afterwards!!The door can be pricey because they don’t serve alcohol here (no fully-nude club in SF can…it’s illegal). So, you’re sitting there drinking your dinky cup of over-priced Mountain Dew while watching really skanky women do really skanky things on stage and practically give themselves gynecological exams for one or two dollars in tips from the almost-all-male, overly excited audience of creeps you wouldn’t feel comfortable sitting next to on the bus.Oh, and if you’re female? Don’t sit too close to the stage unless you’re okay with being included in the show by being hoisted on stage, having your shirt pulled up without your consent, and having a complete stranger remove her panties inches from your face (this happened to TWO friends of mine the night we went). Hey, if this is your cup of tea, more power to you…but for us, it was, well, a bit much.I’d skip this one. There are better clubs out there. ‘Nuff said.

48. Why this place sucks donkey balls harder than any place I’ve ever been in my life: 1) Not only is this the worst strip club on Broadway, but they have the audacity to charge a cover. Honestly, ’nuff said, but I digress… 2) The trannies on Polk are supermodels in comparison to the “talent” working in this stinkhole. 3) Apparently the strippers are notorious for forcing customers to buy lapdances. If you fail to comply, they tell the bouncers that you yelled at them, touched them inappropriately, etc…. whatever it takes to get you kicked out. 4) After refusing to buy a lapdance from a real looker with a good decade on me during my first and definitely last Garden of Eden Experience and getting escorted outside by the Lenny Small working the door, my Sutter Station drinking buddy (affectionately known as “Burt Reynolds” due to his rather impressive moustache) made the mistake of stating the following to the big guy in a calm, calculated Southern drawl: “Let me tell you what, I wouldn’t f*ck one of these girls… with YOUR d*ck.” Naturally, I began to laugh my ass off, which earned me a knuckle sandwich, a broken fibula, and a very expensive EMS ride to San Francisco General. The only reason I didn’t sue these assholes is because at the end of the day, navigating through the City of San Francisco legal system probably would have cost me more money than my medical expenses.Garden of Eden should change its name to Black Hole of Misery. If you have any semblance of self respect, Larry Flynt’s Hustler Club is right around the corner.

49. I’ve been here a few times. THe guys at the door won’t give you a deal. It’s small. It’s crowded on the weekends so most likely you’ll be standing theres enough seating to sit 20 people. The girls are a little better looking than the other low end clubs around. You pay $20/$40/$60 for either a bikini/topless/full nude dance in a tight little space which is like a stool with beads to cover your face. Save your money!

50. Beware!!! Charged my son’s debit card $12,000 for a few hours of drinking. $2,300 twice followed by individual charges for $1,000-$1,500 each until his account was empty. They take your card then the management or an employee with a card reader will empty your account. These guys belong in jail.

51. I was just there last night..

    I expected much more. Girls are alright, saw 1-2 good ones. The DJ pushes u to tip and is constantly bugging. The Girls could be more friendly. I don’t think i’d go back.

52. doorman is friendly, girls are hot, liquor across the street for you to go drink and then come back into the club. Hey…I think I saw you there tonight Ambar M 😉