Union Jacks Club

0 reviews for “Union Jacks Club”

1. This has been my favorite club along with Devil’s Point, for years. It would have received 5 stars if they wouldn’t have taken out half of the seating and the space.I love the girls that tare up your dollar bills to prove the point that you dude, are in fact being an asshole and are not going to get what you want for a buck. I love that tattoos and the skill. I love that I even think some of the boys in here are cute and that is NEVER the case. I love that the bouncer remembers me. I’m saddened that I can’t visit until I find a job because I cannot be trusted with my money when there are naked women in front of me.

2. One of the best clubs I have been to! Everyone is really nice inside!

3. It’s a pretty basic strip club. Went there a few days ago. Their bouncer gives off a Russian Mafia vibe, but if you don’t cause trouble, then he’s a pretty chill guy. It’s a small area, but the lighting and the decor are really good, almost classy. If I had more time and money, it’s definitely a place I’d like to hang around in for a while!This could be a three or four star place, the reason I give it two is because of how it sells itself. They don’t say “lap dances”, they say “A more personal experience” in their “discreet” private rooms. Their sign in the front says “No agents of any kind permitted without appointment”. Other reviews allude to some “back room” where “seedier” stuff happens. But that’s all a bunch of nonsense. They’re a completely regular strip club that gives completely regular lap dances in completely regular lap dance areas, which are basically walk-in closets with a curtain in front of them. Sometimes they aren’t always discreet though, halfway through my dance, a big black woman opened the curtain to make sure we weren’t doing anything we weren’t supposed to.Bottom line: If you want to do something questionably legal, go somewhere else. But if you want boobs in your face and ass in your lap, Union Jacks will do just fine!

4. Quite possibly the most ass backwards situation I’ve ever encountered for a Canadian ID. Apparently given a recent inspector visit, foreign IDs (with A Nexus card) didn’t make the cut.

5. whats with the sign that states obnoxiously NO RAP hip/hop or R&B? I don’t know who instated that rule, obviously someone who probably likes to bang to country or heavy death metal, but seriously, this club is doing itself a disservice by not allowing some of the most sexy songs of all time be played.on another note, one sneaky lady stole the belt right off my boyfriends pants and then wrapped it around this lady and smashed her boobs together. as paris hilton would say, that was hot.

6. Nice nekkid bar with talented dancers, decent beer prices and no sleaze. I come here every time I’m in Portland. Because I’m a Neandertal.

7. So last Friday my honey and I got a sitter and went out on the town drinkin’ like the old days. Two bars and five drinks later, I find myself at Union Jacks in a cushy booth snuggling with my man, cold beer in hand. I have to mention that this was the first strip club I’ve set foot in and it was definitely more comfortable and entertaining than I thought it was going to be. A few of the girls had great bodies and put on quite the acrobatic routine on that extremely high pole – some, not so much, but all in all it turned out to be one very fun evening. I’d have to recommend visiting if you’re in the mood for something a little risque.

8. anther great stripper joint for the Portland fans…more tables for more strippers, but the best part is that your right next door to the jupiter diner (open late) and karaoke across the strip.the girls can entertain you for sure.

9. Ahhhh, Union Jack’s, how I love thee. The super-tall pole, the hot punk strippers who are actually talented dancers, the swanky mirrored decor…. Watching these girls spin down the extra tall pole and then stop themselves just by squeezing their thighs is impressive to say the least. Plus, last time I was there a girl did a Michael Jackson act to Billie Jean, complete with awesome choreography, leisure suit, one glove, and a white hat. I’m glad I don’t live in Portland, because I’d spend my entire income in $1 bills at places like this.

10. Hahahaha, and wow. User Jeni D decided to go through all the bad reviews and send lovely message reading “Go suck a fat dick.If you don’t wanna tip don’t come in, but also don’t shit talk my club.”I mean, my review is a whole two years old but based on that message and the more recent and frequent bad reviews, NO stars. If I could. Lulz. Go to Acrop for steak and boobies.

11. Union Jacks is not a strip club. Its a magical portal where ones every senses are stimulated by lights, smells, tastes, atmosphere and oh yes boobies. Heres the deal though, the girls are such masters of the naked dance craft that you almost forget they are sans le cloth. All of the girls are beautiful and unique in that special Portland Suicide Girl-esque way and all are amazingly talented and can bend in ways that would make Gumby try to wiggle his fist/hand in jealousy. The ladies are also friendly and charming. If you frequent the muff caverns you will know this to be as rare as toilet seat covers in the bathroom (which UJs also has!). I take everyone I can to Union Jacks. I recommend it for every 21st birthday. I occasionally hit it on a 1st date. Sometimes I take friends from out of town. Sometimes I go with friends from in town. Sometimes I go on holidays. Ive known the glory of UJs for a decade and I can say: There is always room for Union Jacks.Other unexpected perk(ies)s: if you do leave your wallet or id at UJ’s the owner personally takes them with him to ensure their safety and will personally return your frantic call the next day and calm you with soothing plans to meet you and return your property. And the bathrooms are NOT SCARY. Where else could you possibly say that about a titty tavern? Also, everyone behaves. Please see the guy who checks ID at the door if you question this.Thank you Union Jacks. Thank you for just being you in all your glitter covered jasmine scented lotion glory.

12. Last stop during my buddies bachelor party this past weekend. Smaller then imagined, great staff…will definitely go again.

13. I have to write a review for Union Jack’s because it’s one of the best strip clubs on the West Coast. There is no strip club in SF that compares. Union Jack’s has a variety of shapes and sizes of women. They also have women with tattoos and unusual hair styles. They have both diversity of appearance and incredible dancing skill. There are extremely hot and talented women here. I wish San Francisco had anything comparable.

14. UNION JACKS! always…a good time. the drinks are good and the babes are even better. i always try and make a stop there too when i have friends in from out of town. its a must, especially when our my most favorite is working, Rocket, shes so rad and def talented and a super babe. it has a BIG stage! and a back stage and a rad environment, UJ is my fav dance club.

15. I wandered in here on a whim and it has come way down from a few years back. I don’t like being pressured, but the bartender is supposed to be a little more customer-aware. She was the only person whose attention I couldn’t get. Overall, not horrible, but not exceptional.

16. So far. my favorite place to have lovely and scantily clad women put their mouths and boobs on me! Went here with a fabulous lesbian couple for a birthday celebration. That already bodes well, right? This place is crowded – it’s a Friday night. It is not wall-to-wall, you can still get around, but if you can find a seat (one of the big cushy ones on wheels), take it! There are two stages, one quite small, but the girls do some amazing shit on/with/around that pole – they get high up! The larger stage had a couple fun little shows where a guy was being teased and danced around by a whole gaggle of dancers. I understand there is a back room – where the seedier shit happens.. I didn’t go there… this time. We eventually moseyed on over to the big stage. My friends were admiring each other and I sat at the stage and plunked down my $1. This girl was just fabulous. She used her hair and face all over my top half and while I am describing it poorly (because I’m slightly flustered just thinking about it) it was awesome! I don’t like having pussy and titties in my face (or anyone’s junk, for that matter) unless they were invited – so she obviously was adept at reading her customers, or just had a style that I dug.There may have been a cover. Drinks may have been not so cheap. But still and all – out of my (so far) 5 strip clubs – this one’s my favorite. It’s all about the ambiance… and the girls, of course!

17. There’s only one private dance area, so you may have to wait. Portland’s no touching rules are followed and make the dances less enjoyable.

18. They have great… french fries. Mmmmmmm. Hot and fresh and… um, fried.

19. Well, I used to give my boyfriend serious shit when he would drive down to Portland to skate and he’d make a pit stop at the Union Jack’s. It used to piss me off pretty bad. He kept on telling me that it wasn’t that kind of strip club, bla, bla, bla. And I used to be a waitress at Sugars, so I had a pretty good idea on how sleazy these joints could be.Anyway, so I took a little road trip to Portland a couple weeks ago and decided to check this place out. I was with a few of my friends and we were all a little curious. After all, the strip clubs in Seattle suck…they don’t serve food, they don’t serve alcohol, etc. Upon arrival I was smitten! It was so divey and dingy and packed with both men and women. Boyfriends with their girlfriends. Girlfriends with their girlfriends. It was sooo much fun. The drinks were cheap and they had some snacks on the menu that weren’t too shabby either.My favorite part about this place was the strippers! They were so fun to watch because they were very talented and skilled. Most strippers I’ve seen (and I’ve seen a lot) are lame. They go on stage and shake their ass, rub their tits…the end. Nothing exciting. But these girls were awesome. They did the most amazing pole tricks and they really looked like they enjoyed working there.Most strippers tend to be a little aggressive and pester customers for dances, but they just walked around and waited for people to come up to them for a dance.Anyway, I want to go back to see some more awesome moves.

20. In Portland, strip clubs are just another type of bar, but some are more female/couple friendly than others. Union Jacks often has a cover, but the drinks are cheap. Sometimes they’re weak too, and the bar lines can get long, but it’s a nice stop over late night after a show at the Doug Fir down the block. What makes Union Jacks stand out from the rest is the pole–the biggest I’ve ever seen–which the girls frequently climb to the top of, flip over, and slide back down. I thought someone was going to get a concussion, but it’s fun to see acrobatics. A friend of mine commented that the girls were, “like ninjas!”.Good for groups, the booths at the back stage are best. Featuring a variety of Portland hipster girls with tattoos and individual style, they choose their own songs and sometimes play local indie music. It’s nice to see some personal style and short hair, and sometimes bigger girls. In true Portland style, there was even a girl stripping to The Blow remix!

21. Note to self and others: Union Jacks is not a flag shoppe. They DO have a very tall pole, though, so coupled with the establishment’s name, I can see why British expats could be confused.Anyway, this was another club highly recommended to our bachelor party group during our Portland visit, and I must say, it definitely lived up to the billing. Union Jacks feels exactly like the kind of dive bar I’d frequent, except with a couple of stages worth of naked girls. If I lived in Portland, this probably WOULD be the bar I’d frequent. Jacks attracts a more diverse crowd – younger, with a higher female-to-male ratio – than most strip clubs, so it feels more casual, more like a place to just hang out and drink while being entertained by their talented dancers.Speaking of which, the girls working here really do earn the designation of “dancers” as opposed to just “strippers.” Whereas most clubs have girls that seemingly just go through the motions, the girls at Union Jacks embody more of a punk/rock n’ roll aesthetic and attitude: equal parts spunky, feisty, and sexy. And pretty damn handy on the pole. Ok, maybe handy is a loaded word… let’s say talented instead. Yes, these gals will climb, spin around, contort on the pole and generally put on an acrobatic show, all while getting full on nekkid. I guess when you’re starting at half-naked, there’s not much more to go, but still. One of them even stripped while performing a hula hoop routine. (Watch out if you’re in the front row, you might get whacked in the head if you lean in too close.) If you’re familiar with Cirque Berzerk from LA (think: a goth cousin to Cirque du Soleil) then imagine that, but, without clothes. Those Chinese acrobats at the county fair are going to seem pretty mundane by comparison, no matter how many plates (or people) they stack on their heads.

22. Great entertainment and talented staff! Cool atmospher and vibe, good location.But my gripe about the $4.50 ATM fee! It’s crap like this this that will make me think twice on returning. Thanks for taking advantage of your customers! Super obvious and rude. Plus a $5 cover. Other spots are more fair than this place.

23. I’d go back if a friend wanted to. I wouldn’t go alone.The girls work for tips, but I kind of felt pressured to do so. I honestly just came in for a look at what errybody was talking about and maybe a drink or two. I didn’t really come to get a lap dance, but figured I’d sit at a stage and throw down some cash for what I liked.The gals were nice, and had nice bodies, but overall I felt kind of bad watching them get fully nude for sometimes no money at all.The beers were good, and they have a patio with a swinging double seater. I liked that part of it 🙂

24. OK I know I’m pushing it giving this place 5 stars but for whatever it’s worth I prefer a place like this for entertainment! The outside is kinda run down, inside is too, but the strippers are beautiful and so talented! I like the set up of two stages. You can easily talk to the girls between turns and get to know them they don’t pressure you to get a lap dance! They’re all very sentually open and attentive during the stage performance if you are up at the stage! I didn’t want to leave but we ran out of cash, wish we had brought more!

25. good solo or with company. ladies are fun to talk to babes- ya’ll best tip

26. Are all you reviewers bros with Gotti haircuts? This place sucks ass.There are lots of things I can say about this place (horrible layout, assholes standing in front of you, fake ass titties), but perhaps the most annoying is the lighting. You can’t see shit with the erratic, flashing strobe lights and that obnoxious black light. Like, we’re there to see girls, not to fly into a seizure and/or squint in the hopes of maaaybe catching a glimpse of neon bits.

27. I stayed down the street from this place at the Jupiter and walked over a few times. Such a great variety of girls. Baby face, tall and beautiful, gothy, small and asian. All friendly and gorgeous.

28. A few years ago this place would have gotten four stars but it for some reason continues to go down hill. The dancers used to friendly,gorgeous and talented but the last few time I has gone down hill big time. The dancers looked cracked out, the wait for drinks was really long, and the music was way too loud. I know that you go for dancing but I want to able enjoy the company that I am with while having a beer.

29. I went in on a Sunday afternoon/evening. The dancers were very friendly and not at all pushy, in spite of how slow it is. The bartender was great too.I ended up talking to one of the dancers for quite a while and was either a very genuine person or the world’s best actor. She even suggested I go to a bookstore… which closed at the same time her shift ended. This means she basically told me about a different place to spend money.I’m not used to strips clubs being such a cool environment, but this place was awesome.

30. There once was a bar called “The Jack”Where for a buck you could check out a rackThe lasses were all fairThey had long shiny hairAnd ink from their necks to their crack.

31. My gf and I visited on July 6. We thoroughly enjoyed the dancers and the alt sex atmosphere. That just isn’t available where we’re from (Reno). Which is probably a good thing, because if we were anywhere near Union Jacks we’d be there A LOT! As my gf jokingly said, we’d end up living in boxes on the street because we spent all our money at the club… Tats and piercings and fetish, oh my! We did not get private dances, so I cannot comment on that aspect of the club. Well drinks were mostly ice in smallish glasses. Thanks to all the lovely ladies for a wonderful time!

32. I went in twice this weekend and had an ok time til I met maddie. Talk about full service.

    Now I know why they have her own booth reserved. She is wiling to suck fuck and

    whatever you want. She dates the owner so she gets away with whatever she wants

    and im happy she does! Got to finger her and then she took my Dick out without

    asking…who am I to decline…but she finished me off good. But now im going to get

    checked cause im a little nervous..

33. I used to come here back in 2004 through 2009. This place was off the charts. The dancers were hot, the food was great, the staff took care of you, and I felt this sense that I was in a place very special… sometimes I even forgot it was a strip club. It was full of great music, stiff drinks, and wasn’t priced too high.I had to move back East for a few years, but now I’m back in Portland and I decided to come see how things were at Union Jacks. This place kinda sucks now. The bartender and the DJ are the same but everything else seems different. The layout changed a bit, with a crappy metal stage, and no sitting room. They have more lap dance rooms but the prices skyrocketed. The girls they have here now are rude, and not nearly as pretty as I remember. And there used to be a buzz here, now it seems empty and I feel weird just hanging out unless I get a few drinks in me. Plus the music isn’t rocking like it used to. It’s all “wub wub”, and before the DJ got there… it was crappy Hip Hop. I used to come to this place and kick the DJ lots of tips just to play some Descendents or Slayer. That’s what this club was…. a rock club with hot naked girls. Now it seems like every other club. So sad. Tonight, I met a few nice girls, had a few beers, said hello to the bar staff I recognized, and resolved I won’t come back anytime soon until I hear Union Jacks got back to it’s roots.

34. This is the most fun I’ve had in a gentleman’s club in a long time. Okay, Vegas but it cost 5 times more. I’m in Portland on business on a regular basis, and a local friend wanted to check out a few clubs. After going to 3-4, we came here and had a blast!The girls were fun, energetic and generally positive. It feels a little divey at first, but after a while, you begin to feel the genuine energy of the place.

35. Take your coolest dive bar and throw some hot naked girls in the background. Subtract that creepy feeling you get in strip clubs not to mention the drinks are actually cheap and you get Union Jack’s. I’ve never gotten a lapdance here but if that was my thing I would. The girls here are sweethearts and they don’t hustle you into anything. If I lived in Portland this would be a regular spot for me.

36. Very cute and friendly dancers. The place was dead at first but it was Sunday night. I prefer Sassy’s but this was across from our hotel. We had to pay a $3 cover charge and since we didn’t have to pay any cover anywhere else, this was a take-back. Still, the ladies were lovely. We are going back next time we’re in east side Portland….

37. There is a small part of me that is like “really, you are going to write a review about a strip club?” I have to though. My boyfriend likes strip clubs, and I feel as though I should should be offended that he likes to go and watch half naked girls dance, but in all honesty, I have a lot of fun going too, so we get to spend quality time together…with a little naked stranger involved. We’ve been to many strip clubs in Portland, we have some great ones, but I have only been to Union Jacks twice and both times made me never want to go back.Trip #1. It’s a Saturday night, and the club is packed, literally packed. All the seats are taken and standing room is even pretty slim. I’m a girl who likes to sit at the rack. I’m a girl who will even flirt a little with the girls at the rack if it means they might be able to get some extra tips from the guys sitting around us. I also leave good amounts of money at the rack. I leave money no matter what, pole tricks do get the girls a little extra though only because there is a little part of me that wishes I could do them too. So a seat opens up at the rack and my boyfriend swoops in. I of course want to get in on the action so I scoot in and sit on his lap. We start throwing money on the rack, having a good old time, when the music stops and over the loud speaker, the dj lets me know that if I do not get out of his lap, I will be kicked out of the club. The club is all quiet, I feel awkward, and we leave the rack. I wasn’t trying to take business from them, I was trying to give them business. The girl didn’t feel threatened, we were both giving her money, but we moved away from the rack and because of it left less money for the girls because we couldn’t even see the stage.Trip #2. My same wonderful boyfriend and I are bar hopping through SE with a good friend and decide to give it another go. My boy has bad allergies, and in the Portland summers it can leave his eyes looking a little red and weary. We had been drinking yes, but rolled into the club maybe three or four drinks in, not quite drunk. There is a cover, so we stop at the door and proceed to pay. The bouncer takes a look at him and exclaims that he is too drunk to come inside. We are more confused at this point, partially because it is early and no one is inside the strip club yet, and even more so because he wasn’t drunk. I eventually talk him into letting us in, but again, more awkwardness then needed.They have some great girls, who really know their stuff, but it seems like they try to drive business away from people who like strip clubs and want to enjoy themselves at them.

38. Cool. A whole lot less scuzzier than most strip clubs I’ve been to. The girls are all cute – most of them are punk rawk and hipsters girls covered in tattoos. All very good dancers and can do amazing things with the pole!The crowd is pretty good too. Definitely a more middle class kind of joint, people seem to be pretty respectful.There’s a porch outback for the smokers. They make a good margarita – frozen or on the rocks. I appreciate that they have cider too for those of us that don’t drink beer. I like the seating – you don’t have to sit right up to the stripper area – in fact you can easily sit in the corner and be removed from a lot of it.The only issue is with the lack of security. I was dissapointed to see that there is really only one bouncer – and he is in charge of the door. There’s no one else to really watch and protect the dancers or the crowd. There was one guy in the crowd who was wasted and very obnoxious about it. We complained to the bouncer a few times but he never got kicked out or removed. That’s annoying. He wasn’t kicked out until he had physically threatened my friend that’s a girl. He should have been removed from the picture a long time ago – esp because he was passed out most of the time.

39. I literally just got a harassment message from someone who works for this company. I do not think this is a good way to run your business. I really hope that you guys go in for yourselves and maybe you will like it. I just wanted to leave an honest opinion.

40. I’m giving this club one star because I’m appalled at how they treat their dancers.My friend danced here one night, and one of the rowdy patrons HIT her. She tried to report it to the bouncer, who refused to kick the patron out. The bartender just said “There’s nothing I can do!” Who does that?!So ladies, for your safety, I don’t recommend dancing here. Go somewhere where the club will actually protect you if a patron gets violent with you. And for customers, go patronize another business because this one obviously doesn’t think that its dancers are people whose lives are worth looking at for.

41. Meh meh and meh. Meh dancers, meh prices, meh ambiance. That’s all I have to say

42. NO !!!!! Go somewhere else! As another said it, lame. One word: SHAKEDOWN! One “dancer” tag teamed our group and threatened to make a scene if we didn’t lay down what she thought she was worth, which wasn’t much. Dancer “Cody”….POS. Period. Visit the neighboring clubs, better bar service, much better and friendlier dancers that wont scam or threaten you.

43. My fiancé and I have been to many strip clubs in Los Angeles, and Union Jacks is far better than the clubs of silicon city. Half of the girls are extremely friendly and will shoot the breeze about their passions, artistic abilities, and travels. Some people don’t care about that stuff but I think it makes them more than a skeleton on a pole. However, every bushel has a few bad apples, and union jacks is no exception. A couple of the dancers will belittle you on stage and yell at you for not tipping enough (we’re tipping fairly well) and complain that they’re not having a good night. You should avoid these girls like a red headed stepchild and reach out to the girls who say three words before proposing a lap dance. Pros -The entrance fee is only $3-Very friendly bouncer-$4 beer -Cocktails are 2 for $9-Privacy in the lap dance rooms – no crazy bouncer staring you down while a hot female is shaking their tatas-Getting a lap dance when you’re $3 shortCons-$4.50 ATM fee-Some Hostile dancers Overall great experience. We thought we were over strip clubs but this place proved us wrong.

44. Loved it had a great night there last night drink prices were good and the girls were great DJ was awesome

45. If you go in early, you get to see the warm up. Which may or may not involve the pole being too slippery and one of the dancers sliding down too fast and landing on her head.But, when the A-team is on the stage, and both poles are going, there’s not a bad seat in the house.I am not a fan of how they moved the private booths to the back. Those used to be the best seats to watch the main stage. Now they’re curtained off for privacy. That’s kind of a waste of space.

46. We went here because the bartender at Jinx recommended it. He said it was a good place for couples. There was a good mix of crowd— couples, gay and straight, some guys…The girls were pretty and their pole work was good. We got a private dance from a girl. It was my first dance and I don’t know what I was expecting but I was underwhelmed. My husband said it was a rip off and that next time we would just sit at the stage. All in all I would go again because it was fun and didn’t feel or look scuzzy.

47. i like this place. It’s clean! do i need to say more? the dancers are real. As real, I mean real boobies! All the workers were nice. I will definitely be back.

48. Things to like: Skilled, “real” dancers who can do some amazing pole tricks. The super tall pole. The location. The rock-star-ish vibe. Good for groups.Not to like: The cover. The so-so service. The atmosphere that is sometimes not so woman-friendly. What I mean is, strip clubs are inherently sleazy – in a good way, like you’re out looking for that titillation. But when they feel sleazy, like when nasty old men come leering up to you and ask when you”l be taking your clothes off, and you are not a stripper and are wearing normal clothes… that feels threatening and scungey. And yeah, it happened to me. I think strip clubs that make sure there is a comfortable atmosphere for their female patrons and they aren’t harassed, will do the best. Union Jack’s has promise there, but you gotta be consistent.

49. Union Jacks was an almost perfect night to a perfect day… loved the SG inspired girls, the chickie with the short blonde punker cut, huge chest piece and wells of ink, amazing pair and ‘tipper’ fm heels! The bartender, contortionista dancer was super cute, funny friendly. The girls showed about equal attention to me and my man, so we both had a great time. Great choice of music from the ladies, all and all we will be back… however… The Rocket dog was too much to contend with… You would never see someone like say Aine tapping her toes on the tip sign and bending down to beg for cash. I would have more respect for a girl doing her set and then asking for a contribution to her boob job or next tat than someone ‘barking’ pay up or get out. Shocker that we weren’t generous. We gladly contributed to every other girl on stage that night, but if there were such a thing a half dollar bills, you would have gotten simply that. Funny thing was the Rocket blew some of the girls off the planet with her performance… but she shot herself out of orbit with her disgusting groveling. The disgust pulled my purse strings and only shelled out a buck for her desperation out of pity and yet respect for the industry and the girls that aren’t shells of beauty. Rocket, an empty shell.

50. This is a motor cycle gang, type of strip club. The strippers have the Rock and Roll, type of look, which is kind of sexy. The strip club is really small. If you are not white, the Strippers will not talk to you. That is not good.

51. The minuses from our Sat night trip: 300 sideways-capped douchebags; absolutely nowhere to sit or even stand out of the way; drinks $1-2 more expensive than elsewhere, and a 10 minute wait time to order them. My friend said someone spilled a bunch of coke on the floor of the ladies’ room when she was in there (this might belong in the ‘pluses’ depending on the reader).The pluses: The girls. Compared to the average fare here in pdx, the women here are knockouts. Several Suicide Girl types if that’s your thing (it’s mine) and more normie types who somehow manage to look just as good despite a paucity of tattoos and eyeliner. They all knew how to use the pole and they even pretended they were having fun, which I appreciated. The music was on the edgier end of pop – Prodigy, NIN, etc. I’ll definitely go back on an off-night when the douchebag ratio is lower.

52. Hooray for boobies! Ok yes I am reviewing a strip joint haha. I don’t really go to strip joints and haven’t been to tons of them but for what it was, it was okay. Pretty small but I like the fact I could chill on a couch and watch pretty girls sucker guys out of money. 🙂 The girls were decent, none really stood out as absolutely gorgeous though. Thank god they all had imperfections hahaha and some were average at very best. But some of them could really dance! The extra tall pole was pretty cool, respect to the girls that dominated that thing. The drinks weren’t bad about average price I guess. I was one of the very few females in a place surrounded by horny douche bags but I sort of expected that hahaha.The decor was crappy, not exactly high class here but lol not the worst by far. Overall it was decent, not very impressed but not put off enough to dislike it either. Have fun!

54. I have been to many strip clubs in LA and a couple in Washington. One could say more than my fair share considering I’m a hetero female. Pretty much all of them sucked as they weren’t women friendly and didn’t offer full bar or in some cases any alchohol at all. Plus the girls have tended to be scar, silicone barbie or some combination thereof.When I was first introduced to Union Jack’s 4 years ago when I was living in PDX, I totally loved it. The girls were all sporting Suicide girl looks and did things like old fashioned burlesque or fire (!) dancing and most of them could work the pole in ways that made me drop my jaw. It was filled with all sorts of people and was very women friendly. I loved it so much I would recommend it to anyone as cique du Soleil with full bar and full nudity. Things seem to have changed. I went there this past weekend with a bunch of friends from my new hometown of Seattle and while it still beats Washington strip clubs hands down it is no longer as super fabulous as I remember and certainly not the 5 stars I was expecting to give.Minus 1 star for the fact that only 3 girls could rock the pole and only 2 girls on shift were Suicide Girls types. The rest were good looking enough but just generic stripper types and seemed to limit their dancing to posing and slapping their own butts(what’s up with that?)Minus 1/2 for the 2-3 month pregnant girl dancing her last night. That was squicky but I’m only taking off 1/2 because my group had some seriously hilarious fun making “Don’t shake the baby!” jokes every time she came on stage(yes, I know that I’m going to Hell, I have my condo on the lake of fire all picked out)Minus 1/2 for the fratastic crowd that we had to put up with until later in the evening and the fact that the area by the main stage is crowded and annoying because some of the seats have been cordened off for lap dancing.All in all it’s still the best strip club I’ve been to and totally worth the $5 cover we had to pay but it is less cool than it used to be.

55. For a strip joint, this place is fucking fantastic!!! I stumbled in on my way home from some previous debachery and thought, having just moved here, fuck it, might as well go in and get this over with. So I walked my 80’s Metal dressed self into the club. I was awed. It’s like vegas on the inside and completely CLEAN!!! The bathrooms were nice and pretty clean, the beer wasn’t too highly priced (2.50 for a PBR) and all the girls were pretty nice and cool to me so I had a really great time. Not sure if they serve food, but that would make the place even better if they do. I probably won’t go there again cause strip clubs aren’t really my thing, but if I frequented them, this would definately be my top choice! Rock on Union Jack, rock on.

56. Awesome club, loved dancing there! Economy slow, need more customers though. House fee is a bit high with less customers coming in. GREAT club though and wonderful girls!

57. Entertaining. Cool smoking patio. Hard to get a drink on a busy night though. Girls are good on the pole here.

58. This place is really a cut above the rest as far as strip clubs go.Now I haven’t sampled all the local flavor in Portland but I did do a couple of places and this one was head and shoulders above the rest. The girls are very nice and the beer is very cheap. All in all a very class act (sort of).

59. Union Jack’s feels evil to me. And I’m not certain why.The staff’s really cool and nice. The female announcer chick is super cool and makes people clap, which I love. And the pole is super high and fun.So what’s my problem? Maybe it’s the lighting. Maybe it’s because it reminds me of the russian mob. Maybe it’s because I became intoxicated here once and got lost (lost? really? it’s one big room…) and then walked into a lapdance room by accident.Clearly I’m in the minority though, so enjoy!

60. The only place I’ve ever cared to dance at…and the only place I go to have a drink on my time off.

    the girls aren’t run of the mill, dumb blondes!